Peanut Jelly and Butter

2005-11-23T21:32:00.000-08:00

Is Goofy a Dog or a Cow?

What has Disney been doing to us all these years? Why would a cow or a dog hang out with mice (Mickey and Minnie) and why would his girfriend be a cow if he was not a cow? But he has many characteristics of a dog. However, Pluto walks on all fours and does not talk so why wouldn't Goofy follow suit. But then you ask why don't Mickey and Minnie and his girlfriend Daisy walk on all fours also? This is a very good question.

I think what we are seeing here is Disney promoting Darwinian philosophies to our children over the past fifty years. But Disney has held back on much of the information we the public need to know in order to solve this perplexing mystery. We know that Goofy has had children so he must have had a mate of the same species but we never see his mate in any of his film appearances (doesn't this seem strange to you?). We see him dating a cow. He has gone on picnics with Daisy accompanied by Mickey and Minnie but not a clue of their relationship resulting in marriage.

So why the cover up by Disney? What have they to hide?

I believe Goofey is a spontaneous mutation and the random occurence of a new species (male). And I believe that another spontaneous mutation and the random occurence of the same species (female) happened at exactly the same time and in exactly the same spot and they mated and propagated a new species that Disney is keeping secret from us.

Of course we all know this is feasible because similar instances are being taught in our schools and universities. A pool of "goo" developed into an organism which continued to randomly mutate and form a higher organism. The process continued for billions of years and millions of species of insects, animals, birds, and fishes came into existence. This random process of mutations always produced a male and a female at exactly the same time and in exactly the same location so these new species could mate and continue existing. Given this as fact we can continue with our reasoning.

The probability of random mutations producing a male and a female at exactly the same time and in exactly the same place in our vast universe would have to be somewhere in the range of 10 to the millionth power and the probablity for this same thing to happen to all the species we see on the earth today would have to be in the range of 10 to the billionth power. Since this is a fact being taught in our schools and not to be questioned I would have to say it is very likely that Goofy is neither a dog or a cow, but a new species altogether.

You've done it again Disney.

2005-10-01T14:28:00.000-07:00

Wealthy Tahoe Landowners Discriminate Against Katrina Victims Because They Are Poor
(This is a Parody of Other Far-Fetched Articles Published in the Media)

Over the years I have heard the urgings to KEEP TAHOE BLUE. Through legislation and great human effort and sacrifice these efforts have been a huge success for the Lake Tahoe Community. This wealthy community has outlawed two-stroke engines in Lake Tahoe which has greatly reduced the pollution from the large recreational use of the lake.

I quote from the September 9, 2005 edition of the Tahoe Daily Tribune and the Lake Tahoe News:

If the last decade has taught us anything, it is that engines are designed to run cleaner, more efficiently and, in the case of marine applications, with a reduced amount of pollution discharge. The advent of more efficient, powerful four-stroke engines has made two-strokes a dying breed. In the case of Lake Tahoe, carbureted two-strokes have long since been banned. It is reasonable to assume four-strokes will continue to run cleaner and more efficiently in the future, but the agency doesn't have to rely on assumptions, it can test the water to ensure quality does not further diminish.

The limited studies performed in Emerald Bay between 2001 and 2002 showed a decrease in pollutants in the water following the two-stroke ban (from infinitesimal to non-detectable)

This leads me to the gist of this article. Where were these people when we needed them? There were no governmental agencies guarding against the use of these engines of destruction in the rescue efforts in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Why were two-stroke engines allowed to further pollute the waters of the already severly damaged and frail eco-system of the New Orleans area.

Was this regulatory process neglected by state and local authorities simply because these people were poor?

Another point brought out in the same article was that Lake Tahoe wants to have washing stations for boats to prevent the introduction of invasive, non-native plants from other areas.

Was this same precaution taken after Hurricane Katrina. Were invasive, non-native plants introduced into this storm ravaged jewel of the South?

What disasters have we started by our misguided attempt to help the people of New Orleans?

Where are the people crying foul?

Why isn't this being reported in the press?

Again, may I pose the question?

Is it because these people are poor?

2005-09-29T12:19:00.000-07:00

When you see older people acting like this, it can only mean one thing.......

You raise your kids and watch them get married. You take them bike riding, roller blading, swimming, fishing, and shooting. You feel tired and old.

Then without warning you get a call and your son tells you that he wants to tell you something. He then proceeds to tell you that he is going to be a father. Which means that I am going to be a grandfather!

Yippeee! Yippeee! I'm going to be a Grandpa.

Sorry for the outburst.

Now I get to do it all over again, but this time as a Grandpa!

2005-09-28T22:55:00.000-07:00

Permanent Records, Missing Socks and Area 51

I know the title of this blog makes me sound crazy, but you have to understand that this is just the way my mind works. What I do with these thoughts is what counts, not the fact that I have them. So, we are about to embark into a look at the fringes of my mind.

Since I was in elementary school I have been told that many items would be placed in my permanent record. Out of fear I succumbed to those in authority and performed well. But now that I am older and a bit braver, I am willing to challenge this whole permanent record “thing”. Maybe this was just a tool to get me to do something that I did not want to do but knew I should do but wouldn’t do unless I had to. (Was that a sentence?) But now that I am older I do these things because I know they are right and people have stopped telling me about this elusive permanent record . Maybe it was just a tool to show me that I did not have it in me to just do the right things.

As for Area 51 there have been a lot of movies, books and articles written about it. I have never been there, at least when I was conscious. I cannot say that it exists or does not exist. It may be where they keep the permanent records if they really do exist, but then how do they get there? Did my third grade teacher drive to New Mexico to put things into my permanent record? I doubt it.

So that leaves me only one logical conclusion. There are no permanent records and Area 51 is where all the missing socks are kept.